Twilight- book crack.

"Twilight this... Twilight that..." That is all I am ever hearing! What the HELL is Twilight? Okay, so I do know what Twilight is. There's a girl named Bella and a vampire named Edward that 1 out of 3 girls is in love with and someone named Jacob. Oh, and don't forget the teams: Team Jacob or Team Edward. But WHAT exactly is all the hype about? I decided to find out.

I bought a paperback edition of Twilight. I had a 30% coupon so it was only $8. I was not dishing out my money just to ease my curiosity. I was quickly annoyed at how vague the story is in the beginning. If I didn't know there were vampires involved I would've stopped reading the book before I finished the first chapter. It was a little dull but I had to keep reading because I knew it was going to be good. Basically the beginning is this: "Bella this, Bella that, I call my parents by their first names, it rains in Forks, it rains a lot, I'm emo, I cry myself to sleep, it rains a lot, I'm crying again..." and so on.

The beginning of the book is almost day by day so it makes it slightly boring because nothing particularly awesome happens every day. It's just a whole lot of talking and staring at how sexy Edward is.

Which brings me to another thing. EDWARD IS SEXY. I'm not sure if it's because I'm imagining the boy who played Cedric Diggory in the Harry Potter movies or if it's that Meyer/Bella keeps telling me how sexy he is or if it's because he truly is sexy, even when he basically exists as words on a page. I am not one to fall for book characters. I find it impossible that a person can love a character in a book (movies and television are a different story since there is a physical manifestation of them.) But Edward. His good looks are dripping out of the ink. WHY? What kind of voodoo magic has Meyer pulled on me to make me fall in love with her character?

I am not sure.

But I do know Edward is amazing. Don't forget good looking. And I basically want to sleep with all of the words that make up the Cullen family.

Anyways, I've just finished the book. Meyer's writing, at times, is a bit annoying. Too many descriptions. Too many repetitions (if I see the word "anxious" or "chagrin" one more time I'm banning them from use). Too many sentences about how Edward makes Bella swoon... Oh, and speaking of Bella- she seems like the worst character on the face of this planet. I am not amused by her weakness and stupidity and horniness.

That being said, Twilight is like fucking crack and I'm going to buy the other books as soon as I get paid.

PS: What's with Stephanie being a drama queen and not publishing the Midnight Sun book or whatever it was called?

PPS: I was making fun of Miley yesterday and today I find out I have to wear a Hannah Montana shirt at work for all of September.